The Art of Being Flexible

Being flexible in a foreign country is key to survival and success.  I would put this trait over any other trait that is essential for traveling and living in another country.  Living in a Latin culture, it is especially necessary to realize the importance of being flexible. 

What does being flexible look like in American culture?  You are meeting a friend for coffee and she calls to tell you she will be a half hour late, traffic is horrible.  You say, “Okay, no problem. I’ll be waiting in the café for you.”  This is being flexible, right?  What about at work, when you have a meeting scheduled and someone important can’t make it.  Most likely you found this out earlier in the week or at least have a day to call others involved in the meeting to reschedule.  This is being flexible, right? 

In Latin cultures, like Nicaragua, there would be many similar situations, but perhaps a bit more last minute.  On two occasions, Nate and I have arrived to the AsoFénix office ready to go for our 10 am Monday meetings.  We are patiently waiting and time is ticking away.  Finally at 11:30 am, I ask someone if we’re having our meeting, they laughed and said no.  Well, now we know we don’t have to be waiting around for a meeting that isn’t going to happen!  The first time this happened, we were both a little miffed.  We had traveled about an hour on two buses across Managua to arrive on time for the meeting, which consequently didn’t occur.  A simple phone call would have aided us in this knowledge.  We left the office that day feeling defeated.  Six hours of our day traveling and waiting around for meetings that never happened, we felt like we wasted a day.  There could have been ten other things we could have accomplished in those six hours, but alas, we ride the buses back home with our heads hanging low.

‘Time wasted’ would be the North American viewpoint of this situation, because time is like a commodity.  Time has the ability to be bought, gained, saved, spent and wasted, all with an emphasis on the future.  If we save time now, we will have more time for later.  Then we can accomplish x, y and z tasks.  This would get me ahead for tomorrow. 

In Latin culture, time is not viewed in this regard.  Time is fluid and based on the present moment.  There is no necessity to plan tomorrow when it is today, because as we all know that plans change.  Plans may get in the way of living life in the present moment.  Not to mention that within the fluidity of time there is an emphasis on relationships.  It would be rude to not stop and chat with people along the way, so being “late” to wherever you are going is not important.  Fostering relationships and checking in with those around you is the most important “task” at hand, not arriving early to a meeting that will most likely start late anyways. 

How does flexibility tie into all this anyways?  Here is a perfect image a fellow North American coworker offered recently.  She said, “You have to be like a spaghetti noodle down here to be able to go with the flow.”  We (North Americans) all laughed and couldn’t agree anymore.  It was earlier that morning that several changes had occurred in the office.  The date for a renewable energy fair that AsoFénix is organizing changed dates for the THIRD time in six weeks.  Just nailing down a date more than a month in advance is practically impossible to do in a culture that doesn’t plan a week out!  This was frustrating for many involved in organizing volunteers and logistics for the fair.  Response:  Okay, I’m flexible!  Good thing we have a white board calendar in the office!  I’ll erase the date and change it!  Ironically, I choose the ONE permanent marker out of five other white board markers on the white board to write the “new” date.  I realized this after the fact and scrambled to find a way to erase it before it stuck for eternity!  Coincidence? 

As mentioned earlier, this was one of those mornings that our 10am meeting was cancelled.  All the Nicaraguans seemed to know the meeting was canceled, but none of the North Americans knew of this until 10:10 am that morning.  Response:  Okay, I’m flexible!  I’ll just learn how to use GoogleDocs and have an impromptu meeting with the interns about a project we are collaborating.  In addition to our “usual” Monday morning meetings, we usually have a staff lunch prepared for everyone.  We found out there would be no lunch for us at noon, or any other Monday in the future because of budget cuts.  Response:  Okay, I’m flexible (but hungry)!  We’ll eat lunch later or pick something up on our way to the bus stop!  To top it all off, Nate and I had our bags packed for a week to travel to the country to live with a local family.  We were ready to leave after our supposed lunch.  The man we were going to travel with tells us around 10:30 am that he has to buy more materials in Managua the following morning, and won’t be leaving until after that.  Response:  Okay, we’ll go with you tomorrow!  Our bags are packed and ready to go!  We’ll leave them at the AsoFénix office, and return to the MCC office, where we always have a bed to sleep in!

This is what flexibility has looked like to us “cheles” (gringos) here in Nicaragua.  We are learning that the ability to adapt and go with the flow in any given situation will aid our survival, and ultimately our happiness here.  If we got all bent out of shape with our panties in a wad every time our plans changed, we would never last in this culture!  Instead, I opt for new lessons—cultural adaptability, flexibility and going with the flow!  I challenge each of you to try it out in your own culture and see how you fair.  Can you be any happier when you realize that you are ultimately not in control?  Can you be open to things changing as you go?  Practice the “Art of Being Flexible” in 2011!